The ABC of Online Dating

Are you looking to spice up your life a little or add some romance...or maybe find that perfect love connection?

 Cool! Jump right in...the online dating waters are just fine and you will have lots of company. There are millions of other people already splashing around when you do decide to take the plunge!!

If you're new, or relatively new to the online dating scene, I want to try and help you find your way by following the tips and recommendations presented here and your initial experiences will be more enjoyable, safer and will give you better results.

Do a search of "online dating" and you will be presented with more than  42 searches and web pages from which to make your selection! Wow... a little overwhelming to say the least. But don't let the huge numbers discourage you, if you can follow the preparation and selection methods described below you will easily find your perfect dating site match.

So the first thing is to get yourself matched up with one or more online dating sites that fit you and your needs. The questions below should help you narrow things down by applying them to your own circumstances.

What Type of Dating Site?

Straightforward? - no ethnic, religious, or cultural themes. Asian, Black/Ebony/African American, Italian, Jewish, Senior Citizen, the list goes on...

Do some searching using the terms below as a guide. Use the quotes as shown because this will give you a much more accurate search and less rubbish to go through.

• "online dating" + senior
• "online dating" + Christian
• "online dating" + African American
• "online dating" + Asian
• "online dating" + whatever you want to put here

Get the idea? A search on each of the examples above will pretty much give you what you might be looking for.

If you're on a tight budget, just add the word "free" and again use the quotation marks as below in your search in Google.

• "online dating" + free
• "online dating" + senior + free ...etc.

You will need to look a little harder to find high quality free dating sites or personal services. REALLY FREE dating sites with lots of members, lots of activity, and lots of member services are pretty hard to come by. You'll understand better after you do a few searches for free dating websites.

A search for dating reviews and forums can also be very helpful, if not vital in getting the best experience form your search. When looking at the forums, try a post yourself byasking a question and seeing what response you get. They won't always be positive as with any forum on the Internet there are some stupid people who persist in being revolting! 

• "online dating" + review OR reviews
• "online dating" + forum OR forums

With the dating related forums, you can read about good and bad experiences others have had with particular dating and personals web sites. Always take these with a pinch of salt as some of the postings are very likely to be from the owners of some of the sites!

Dating services reviews will give you some good info as well. Look for genuine, unbiased reviews. Many of the dating review sites out there are willy-nilly listings someone has thrown together to earn commissions.

Another way to find good dating sites is by asking friends and co-workers who may have tried, or are using online dating or personals services. You may be surprised to find out how many of your single friends are members of a personals site. In reality this is probably the best way forward as you are more likely to get a truthful response if you can bare your soul to a friend or workmate! If not just listen to the tittle tattle and you might just pick up a hint that way.

How Much?

Monthly fees vary widely, but the average is around $24. Most dating and singles sites will give you a discount if you pay for two or months in advance.

I would suggest you only buy into a one month membership with any new dating service you join. If you decide you like it simply extend your membership. If you don't like the service, you cut your losses at the end of the month (don't forget!), and avoid the hassles of requesting a refund, or canceling billing.

Tight Budget Dating Tip: Most free dating sites have low activity, and member activity is what makes personals and dating sites tick. So really if you can afford it go for a well known paid site. The easy way is to see the sites that come at the top of your search on Google. Not the sponsored ones but those just below.

Solution: Join 3, 4 or more free dating sites. If you find that their combined activity serves your needs... you're good to go. If not, you'll have gained a good familiarity with online dating, and a better understanding of what you want, when and if you decide to plunk down some bucks for a paid membership.

Telling Your Own Story

Now write your story (aka: member profile). No great detail; just write like you're writing to the man or woman you seek, or make out it is a friend you already know. Write a little about you, stating one or more of your unique qualities. Write a little about the person you're seeking. Don't write a huge list no one will want that!

You'll save some time if you write and save all your profile data to a text editor or word processor file. Then, you can COPY and PASTE it to the proper areas of your online dating profile.

As things change, and as you grow, you will want to update and modify your profile statements.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

You will generally get 3 to 10 time better response with a posted photo than without. People don't generally spend much time on profiles with no photos... so take the hint make sure your picture is one you want to be seen! Obvious I know, but you will see some really weird and wonderful pictures on sites! Use a natural photo with a plain background taken bya friend rather than a "passport" in a booth type they usually make the person look as though there should be some prison numbers on the photo somewhere!

If you don't own a digital camera, web cam, or scanner, take a few photos and a cd or memeory stick to your local Office Depot, Staples, or general office supply store. They should be able to scan and copy your photos to your cd. Then you can easily add one or more to your dating site profile. You could also ask friends and relatives who own a digital camera or scanner.

Digital cameras are very inexpensive these days. Check eBay for some of the best deals.

Stay Focused and On-Track

You may want to start a journal, (on paper, or in a text file), to log your "love search" progress. Make notes of URL links of sites you like (you should also bookmark these sites), restrictions, any new member specials, member benefits and services, monthly fees, etc.

When I first started, I also wrote out a statement describing what I wanted to accomplish by joining a dating site. You may want to do the same. These statements and a well-kept journal will help keep you focused and organized. Organized endeavors always yield greater results than haphazard approaches.

Safe-Date Policies

Vital that you use common sense here, in a nutshell meet at a public place, make sure you tell someone where you are going and keep your cellphone alive at all times. Don't get sidetracked to go anywhere unusual for the first meeting. For more information take a look here

Check this out to help you avoid the risks of online dating